so i wasn’t quite sure why, after having keaton, i just never really felt like blogging. every new moment in my pregnancy i thought- man, i can’t wait to share this! but since this little man has become a sweet little presence in our day to day lives, i have felt forced in my postings. thinking of things that i think people want to hear or read about. which is nice, but not the reason i started this little blog here. then i thought maybe i was focusing too much on myself on the blog and that made me uncomfortable, so, again, i focused on others. then i remembered why i started this thing in the first place.
when trevor and i first found out that we had a sweet little baboosh on the way, i started this blog to not only keep friends and family updated as to what we were up to, but as a place to share my thoughts with our unborn son. to tell him how we prepared for his arrival, and how we couldn’t wait to get our hands on him. and now that he is here, i want to go back to the heart of it all. to telling my son how loved he is. to documenting milestones. to give him something to look back on in the future and see how these months and years of his life, most of which he won’t have an actual memory of, were spent being filled with love by the people around him. when he’s older he can read these posts and think- wow, i never knew. when he has children of his own he can think- wow, i never knew they loved me as much as i love this new little person of mine. and God forbid anything should happen to trevor or i, i want keaton to have something tangible to cling to when he thinks of us.
so thank you for being patient. and for being loyal. and for being understanding. i can see how blogging can make you a better person in some ways … this amount of introspection has been surprisingly helpful in getting back to the heart of being my husband’s wife and my son’s mother. and i am taking it all in. every moment of it. and i will share that with you.