while i don’t agree with everything i read in her articles (or usually anyone’s articles, so i guess i like to disagree?!) … this hit me today. and i wanted to share it. it’s a reminder about the calling of motherhood. and the strength of the Cross.
Live the gospel in the things that no one sees. Sacrifice for your children in places that only they will know about. Grow them up in the clean air of gospel living. Your testimony to the gospel in the little details of your life is more valuable to them than you can imagine. If you tell them the gospel, but live to yourself, they will never believe it. Give your life for theirs every day, joyfully. Lay down pettiness. Lay down fussiness. Lay down resentment about the dishes, about the laundry, about how no one knows how hard you work.
Stop clinging to yourself and cling to the cross. There is more joy and more life and more laughter on the other side of death than you can possibly carry alone.
-rachel jankovic, from desiringgod.org
this surpasses just the calling of motherhood, it seems pretty in line with the calling of the christian walk. when our hearts change, our lives change. our behaviors change, our spirit changes.
but i am really beginning to understand the sanctity of motherhood as of late, although this will be a journey not a destination for me. i love my son. so much. and in loving him, i lay down my selfishness. i lay down the fact that i left grad school and a profitable and notable degree when he came to live in my belly because that’s what needed to be done at the time for our little family. i lay down my body, not only to knit him in my womb, but to feed him and comfort him on call. i lay down my struggles with feeling inadequate or less-than because i am only 26 years old.
i lay these things down for this sweet young man who is quietly teaching me who i am.
who i am meant to be. who God is. and who God wants me to be. i not only lay these things down, i learn the lies that stand behind them.
i lay down my misunderstanding of motherhood, and i embrace what i am being taught. such a beautiful love, such a sacrificial love.
who knew someone who has been on this earth only 8 months could be so wise?